The Monstrous Cavalcade
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On the wrestling arts

The entirety of my knowledge of wrestling comes from playing Royal Rumble on the Megadrive. My introduction to Hulk Hogan, Jim Duggan and The Undertaker came in the form of their slightly greasy looking 16-bit sprites dashing around the screen, being satisfyingly clobbered by 16-bit folding chairs. What sticks in my memory about those wrestlers is that they all seemed to have basically the same animations, but each was given a signature move that was really only distinguished by the name it was given in the game manual.

These signature moves are something that all wrestlers seemingly have, but it's clear that the set of all spectacular, safe, yet practical maneuvers is considerably smaller than the set of all wrestlers. That doesn't stop them throwing unique names on them though; a somewhat desperate one-upmanship expressed as creative nomenclature.

I'm often sarcastic on my Twitter feed, but I genuinely love this little aspect of wrestling.

I don't really care for the rest of it.

Part of the fun of being a wrestler must be the ability to rename basic grappling techniques to things like "The Doomsday Bar Mitzvah".

He's got him in the agonising "Correspondence of Socrates"; look at the pain on his face.

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